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- David Bentley admits that sometimes even he forgets that he's still at Spurs
- Portsmouth bell man enters administration, will be deducted 10 tattoos
- Moussa-T Dembele: "I'm horny. Horny, horny, horny."
- Newcastle warned that value of Demba Ba may go down as well as up
- AVB plans BBQ with his new CFC MONEY
- Ipswich Town clubshop reduce price of 9-0 Man Utd defeat video for fourth time
- Newcastle warned that if they do not keep up Ba repayments the Sports Direct Arena may be repossessed
- Martin O'Neill blames unspecified glitch for Steve Bruce Twitter unfollow
- Burlesque fan McCoist reveals excitement at Rangers asset-stripping
- Abramovich admits Russia's thirst for regime change got to him
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Democratic People’s Republic of Korea 3 – 0 Brazil
Loyal footballing emissaries off to a flier in campaign for glorious and inevitable World Cup victory
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Lack of African stereotypes threaten Ghana’s Cup of Nations place
Country’s African credentials questioned after ‘keeper holds on to cross against Serbia
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England World Cup chances boosted by fan’s “funny feeling”
Supporters get their hopes up after man announces to Waterstones colleagues that something in his gut tells him Three Lions will win it
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Doctors say elderly and very young are most at risk from World Cup fever
Government moves to play down fears over dangerous disease which can cause a compulsive need to wear novelty wigs
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New FIFA rankings downgrade Ronaldo from ‘world class’ to ‘very, very, very good indeed’
Recent workmanlike performances rule out midfielder from potential intergalactic matches
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Milwall fans: “no-one likes us, we do care”
Surge in fans seeking counselling prompts reassessment of London club’s bad boy image
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Wright-Phillips clinches place in England squad after leaving phone switched off
Franco Baldini praises diminutive impact sub’s ability to adapt tactics to any delivery, ‘be it mobile, email or post’
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Save 6pointers campaign leads to surge in audience numbers
Online campaign given boost after FA figures reveal surge in support for threatened matches
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Fulham move quickly to secure their place as nation’s ’second team’
Preparations underway in West London to ensure Cottagers aren’t usurped by popular Blackpool in country’s affections
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Blackpool’s play-off party pooped by fans of previously promoted clubs
Bradford, Barnsley and Hull supporters team up to plan intervention ahead of season of woe
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Where Are They Now?: Manchester United 9 – 0 Ipswich Town
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The Big Debate: Has football become racist again?
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Where Are They Now?: Sutton upset Coventry in the 1989 FA Cup
- ...in 2003 England win the Rugby World Cup and the sport overtakes football in popularity for the first time, a position it has held ever since
- ...in 1971 Repeal of the primitive Victorian legislation that outlawed keepy-uppies as a form of masturbation
- ...in 1965 Geoff Hurst admits to a friend that he has absolutely no anecdotes about his life so far
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- 2.4 Children, the sitcom Nile Ranger watches to take his mind off football
- 404 Internet error code which frequently frustrates novice computer user Harry Redknapp
- Se7en Joey Barton's second favourite Morgan Freeman film after March of the Penguins
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- First Glen Johnson steals toilet seat. Now Ant Worrall-Thompson steals cheese. I say bring back death penalty. - Clive, Humberside
- I agree with Clive, sudden death penalties are super! - Stefan, Germany
- IF ANY1 DESERVES DEATH IS PREMIER LEAGUE REFS! THAT WAS NEVER A RED!!!!111 - Smiley Rod, Burwash
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